Louise Swann

by Louise Swann

I think that this is relevant to my life and experience.I have lived all of my life with what I called as a child 'the fear'. I now know this as anxiety syndrome. I suffered badly with cystitis as a child but eventually grew out of flares in my later teens. 8 years ago after the loss of my 18 year old daughter I started with the need to pee frequently. This got steadily worse and symptoms began to involve pain. After some years I was diagnosed with interstitial cystitis. My 35 year marriage began to fail and I divorced 3 years ago. I was very hurt angry and embarrassed that my husband asked for the divorce. I have done a great deal of spiritual work and realise that I was often angry and unhappy in my marriage due to some unkind and unreasonable behaviour by my husband. I have also been angry with myself for my failure to face the truth and be proactive in improving my life. I want to let the past go but despite having a much happier life now I still find it hard not to rehash the past in my mind. So, yes, I am quite willing to believe that my illness is a result of my mental state. To top it all, despite never having been without , I have fears and anxiety around money. I desperately want to do all I can to heal myself

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